Being Part of the Party (Twenty-Fourth Sunday after Pentecost)

November 8, 2026 Sermon Reflections

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One of the challenges we sometimes face when reading Jesus’ parables is that he often tells stories that involve cultural traditions that most of us aren’t familiar with. And so, it can often seem to us that the situations people face in these stories must be as odd and confusing to them as they are to us.

But in fact, Jesus’ first hearers knew exactly what the traditions were that he was talking about. And that’s true of today’s parable as well. The wedding tradition was that, after a potentially long period of engagement, the groom would come to the home of the bride and a multi-day wedding celebration would begin. As part of the welcoming tradition, bridesmaids would greet the groom and escort him to the home of the bride in a sort of parade, no matter what time the groom arrived.

And because there were no cell phones or flight tracking software, there was no way to know exactly when the groom would show up. You had to wait and you had to be prepared. You might be waiting for days. Everybody knew this, and that was because everybody had been to weddings. Many of them had been bridesmaids themselves.

And this is crucial to remember, because ever since the time of the King James Version of the Bible, every English translation I’ve ever seen renders the two groups of bridesmaids as the “wise” and the “foolish.” And so sometimes, because WE aren’t familiar with these traditions, we end up thinking that the “wise” are somehow super-smart and deeply insightful in figuring out what nobody else could.

And maybe they were smart, but the actual word Matthew uses to describe them is “phronemoi” – and it simply means “prudent”; or “attentive”; or “thoughtful.” Before they ever became bridesmaids, they already knew the drill. They paid attention. And they acted accordingly. And that meant that the “phronemoi”:

Considered what it meant to be a bridesmaid – that is, they weren’t just guests at the wedding – they had a job to do; they thought about that job, and they considered what it was that would be expected of them, and how they could make the wedding party better by how they participated…

Planned ahead – they knew they couldn’t just show up; they needed to do stuff, just like modern bridesmaids often have things to do things to help the bride before the wedding. And in this case, it meant taking time to go and get extra oil (among other things) that they’d need to have as they waited and as they paraded the groom to the bride’s house…

Appreciated the fact that this had some cost! Today, we’ve all heard and read horror stories of the costs some brides inflict upon their bridesmaids! Oil was pretty cheap, and by today’s standards, the cost of a little extra oil for their lamps was almost negligible. But they went and spent that money, because that was the cost of being part of the wedding…

What they did was absolutely normal and expected, and their actions wouldn’t have surprised any of Jesus’ first hearers. These “phronemoi” were “wise” simply in the sense that they paid attention and thought about what they were doing. They were not the surprising or unusual characters in this story.

The surprising bridesmaids were the first five morons! And that’s actually the word Matthew uses to describe them. They’re called “moronai,” and it’s the Greek word from which we get the English word “moron.” And in Biblical Greek, it has the same connotation as it’s colloquial use in English. It does not mean that these five are just a little silly, or naïve; or that they’re uneducated or that they have some kind of learning disability that might prevent them from understanding the interpersonal dynamics.

Whenever “moronai” is used in the New Testament (and it’s almost always translated as “fool” or “foolish”) it refers to somebody who should know better. Somebody who’s capable of doing better. Or somebody who simply doesn’t pay attention. Basically, the person who knows darn well they shouldn’t text and drive, but does it anyway. Those are people who would be called “moronai”!

What is wrong with these “moronai”?! That, actually, is one of the questions we’re supposed to ask when we consider this parable. And the problem with calling them “foolish” is that it’s a cutesy word in English, which makes it easy for us to dismiss these five as simply a bit silly or naïve. But the problem is much bigger than that.

In contrast to the “phronemoi”, these “moronai” are people who:

Are busy thinking about how much fun the party will be, without considering the fact that THEY are supposed to be helping with the party; they seem excited to be invited to the party, but don’t consider what it means to be a participant in making the party happen…

Never get around to preparing – it would have been completely, totally and in every other way inconceivable to Jesus’ first hearers that these five wouldn’t have known they needed to have extra oil. They knew it. But they never got around to it. After all, they were busy with other stuff. And their problem wasn’t that they had less time than the others (who would also have been busy). It’s just that they didn’t really make preparing for the party a priority in their lives…

Figure that somebody else will cover for them – “hey, just give us some of your oil”, they say to the others. The problem isn’t even that the “moronai” don’t have the money to buy the oil; they just assume somebody else will have brought enough. But for the party to have the 10 lights that the bride wanted, there needed to be 10 lamps, and the “phronemoi” (who again are the thoughtful ones) realize if they enable the “moronai” there may be no lamps at all. But even at the end, the “moronai” don’t seem to appreciate this fact…

But of course, the point of this parable isn’t wedding etiquette. Jesus compares the kingdom of God to a wedding celebration. And part of the point of this parable is that if you know how to prepare for a wedding party, you should do those same things as you get ready for the coming of God into your life.

And among other things we might learn from this parable, this means that, like the “phronemoi” we should understand ourselves as people who:

Are not only invited to God’s party, but people who are called to be participants in the party right now. The thing about the “phronemoi” is that they consider what it means to be part of the party before the fullness of the party arrives. They think about what they have to do right now to get ready.

And for us, that often means staying focused on what Jesus is calling us to do right now to help share a foretaste of the coming feast of the kingdom of God, even if our role doesn’t seem that big. Often, it’s easy to get caught up in all the big and sometimes scary events happing in the world around us that we can’t really change or do much about. But the point of the parable is that sometimes the call of Jesus is simply to stay focused on making sure we have the extra oil so we can be a light to the people right around us. After all, the light of one of those lamps wasn’t very bright, but it could help somebody right next to you. And so maybe the one of the points of the parable is for us to focus on doing some of the seemingly

“small things” we can do to help neighbors in our midst – the Thanksgiving Adopted families, the Giving Tree and the weekly packaging and sending of food to people in our community who need it …

Make the time to do things God wants us to do, even when we’re busy. We always have ways of helping others and sharing God’s love going on in our congregation. But as we move into November and December, we put it into overdrive! Yet in one respect, this is counter-intuitive and maybe even a bit insane! After all, this is usually the busiest time of year for all of us, and everybody understands if somebody is “too busy” to help.

And yet, making the time – even and especially when you’re busy – is one of the ways you show that following Jesus is a priority in your life. Doing what God asks you to do to be the light – and to prepare to be the light even when you’re busy – is one of the points of this parable…

Contribute to the cost of the party – one of the temptations of our society is that we often like to think that “somebody else” will take care of things, or that “somebody else” will pay for whatever needs to be done, or even (especially around election season), that if we elect the right people, they’ll take care of all our problems for us.

But the fact is that if we really want to make things better – and we really want to bring light into dark places – it means we all have to be participants and contributors to the solutions. And part of the reason I think Jesus told this parable was that he knew a lot of his followers would be tempted to sit back and wait for God to fix things. But our call is to be participants in the coming kingdom of God right now; and to be people who prepare to be participants for the long haul; and to be willing to put our own time, money and effort into being part of the party, instead of just hoping God or somebody else will kick in some extra oil…

Today’s parable concludes kind of harshly. And so do the next couple of parables that follow this one! But the parable is rooted in some really good news.

And that good news is the reminder that Jesus has not only invited us to be part of his coming kingdom, but that he’s made us bridesemaids – participants in that party who have an important and valuable role to play, even if those roles may seem small to us.

And in order to be the kind of participants Jesus calls us to be, we don’t have to super smart or possess some kind of deep, secret spiritual insight that others don’t. Instead, being participants is often simply about paying attention each day to what Jesus is doing and calling us to do. It’s about caring about the coming party enough to do the prep work now to share a forestaste of the party with others right now. And it’s about investing ourselves and our resources in such a way that we’ll continue to be ready to share the party, no matter what the future holds.

Amen.